The day was over…
I would stand by the window and fix my eyes at the smoldering skies erupting in a nimbus of flame, its crimson ferocity reflecting the seething inferno of impotent fury screaming inside me. Earphones on, music in earsplitting volume, I’d watch in forced wonder as the setting sun spins a blazing web of fire. And I would drift off into a clandestine world… distancing myself from their pain.
But the problem with fantasy is that it’s hard to tell the beginning from the end. It kind of just swallows you and leads you on ‘til you find yourself caught in a fool’s dance… spinning round and round in a mockingly blissful rhythm ‘til your knees give way and you’re gasping for air. The red curtains close and you find yourself shrouded in perpetual darkness, staring at the obsidian sky… cold, indifferent, bereft of stars…
At his funeral, the sun began to set. And I stared at it expectantly, half hoping that it’d burn clean every last taint of violence and hurt. But no peace came… Only a bewildering net of mixed emotions… a sense of loss even. My anger evaporated.
I looked at the sky again and saw nothing but a feeble ginger haze.
Peace finally came
as the last embers of hate
fizzled within me.
恵
Eradicating hatred leads to finding peace !!!
very true 🙂 thanks for commenting
Very well done kz!
thank you ^^
I know what this is about…and I think these posts are a good idea – and the palpable feeling of peacefulness flows.
intentionally vague. but you’ve stumbled upon my blog earlier than others so you have an idea of the story. lol thanks much for commenting ^^
Wow… that’s some first sentence! Nice when peace comes… good one KZ!
glad you liked it. thanks for dropping by Ted ^^
Once your enemy is gone who will be left to hate.
true.. no one left to hate or fear. still, i lost a dad,only one i had. thanks for commenting joe ^^
even writing helps you to leave the hate and fear behind, right? a powerful post and the image is stunning
Thank you for contributing, kz
thanks so much 🙂
each piece of your writing amazes me.. a great message conveyed here.
thank you 🙂
Great writing that invokes the complexities and emotions of loss.
thanks 🙂
As always, I’m finding with your written words, a great depth of emotion kz. This is deep and moving, feelings raw but coming to an internal sense of peace at the end. Very well written haibun!
thanks so much 🙂
Powerful emotions expressed here. Well done.
thank you ^^
Wow.. just so impressive writing, and I’m left with many important questions… great and wise.
thanks, Björn ^^
There is so much power in this, and a beautiful resolution in the haiku. Very well expressed.
thank you very much ^^
i felt some very deep emotions developing and love the bit of mystery you leave us with…i love how you ended it with a sense of peace within. ♥
thank you ^^ glad you liked it ^^
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