“Every Friday authors from around the world gather to share their 100 words based on the photo prompt and offer constructive crit and encouragement to each other. This creates a wonderful opportunity for free reading of very fresh fiction! Readers are encouraged to comment as well.”
Copyright – Sandra Crook
My bike skidded to a halt, spraying grit in several directions. My ears caught a faint swishing sound.
From miles away, I sensed it running towards me… strong, swift yet of monstrous built… a half-human with a head resembling that of a wild boar’s.
Its mouth was agape, baring gnarled, razor-sharp fangs…red tongue flickering like fire, dribbling disgustingly…luminous eyes flashing malevolently…
“Be gone, you murdering pig!” he half-roared, half-squealed as he charged.
I smiled at the irony of his words just before I fired, the silver creating a scarlet emblem on his forehead, blood splattering on the gravel.
© 2013 K.Z. Morano
The Eclectic Eccentric 
I like the murdering pig line (nicely ironic) and your description of the pig is excellent. In the opening sentence, the way it’s structured says the bike is aware of the sound, which I know it isn’t. Maybe “As my bike skidded to a halt, spraying grit , I was suddenly aware of a faint swishing sound”. If I counted correctly, that has the same number of words. 🙂
janet
haha what’d i do without ya.lol ^^ thanks a lot. will edit now
What a truly gruesome description, well done kz.
thank you 🙂
Niiiiiiice!!!
I love that.
haha thanks. somehow i knew you’d like this ^^
hehe 😀
Sorry, for some reason I hadn’t clicked like. I was just going through all of them and noticed that. Corrected now though 🙂
🙂
Oh I see you building up a role of a heroine here! She actually takes time to smile before blowing his head away, the gothic fantasy of it all! This style has appeal kz, I really think it does.
thanks 🙂 yup i so wanted to be a bad-ass biker monster slayer even just in friday fictioneers lol
You use lots of seriously sharp details in here — and they bring your story to life. I could see the beast’s fangs, eyes, and tongue. And great action, too!
thanks ^^
kz, I am in total awe of your descriptive terminology. Takes my breath away! Well done! “)
thank you ^^
Oh, thank goodness for that, kz; he was just about to get me..!
Great story… you master of description.. 🙂
haha one of the great things in writing fiction is that i could be some bad-ass biker chick even just in the stories ^^ lol
Dear kz,
Masterfully disturbing imagery. I’m going to my happy spot now.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Ps. For some reason your link isn’t working now. It was this morning.
thank so much ^^ i deleted the link then added a new one ^^
I love it! The more gruesome the better.
Hey, I’ve written a script that I need some feedback on, if you have some time at some point I would LOVE your feedback: http://jasminplease.wordpress.com/2013/04/11/script-advice-and-feedback-needed/
I loved that! Those are my type of stories!!!
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/04/10/4290/
thanks so much Scott ^^
the link you put in the tool is not working.. maybe you should delete and submit a new one .. loved the description..
i did now ^^ thanks so much ^^
Hi KZ, This was very good, especially the creature’s description. Btw, your link in Friday Fictioneers is probably not working..
i wonder what happened.lol already submitted a new one ^^ thanks 🙂
What a picture you painted with so few words!
Powerful stuff, well done.
Great imagery. I ditto what kdillmanjones said! Excellent as always.
Tom
That was great kz, so vivid. I also loved the murdering pig line. 🙂
Mad Max and Razorback Movie sprung in my head – nice visuals as only you can kz 🙂
Really strong writing and a chilling story.
Blood and gore! Excellent! Great story kz.
Fabulous stuff, kz! Seems you can turn your hand to just about anything. I loved the ‘murdering pig’
🙂
I can hear the blood splattering – yuk. Great images in this piece – the skidding – I could all see it playing out in front of me.
Loved the murdering pig, very gruesome, loved it
Dee
Wonderful story and for some strange reason I enjoyed all the gruesome qualities in the story especially the murdering the pig line 🙂
A girls gotta defend herself. Well played. Fun read.
Interesting story. It gets me wondering what sort of world this is taking place in. Post-apocalyptic mutant setting?
Good stuff kz. Waiting for the movie now – which I imagine will be X rated!
Your description is priceless and draw me into the story right away.