“Every Friday authors from around the world gather here to share their 100 words based on the photo prompt and offer constructive crit and encouragement to each other. This creates a wonderful opportunity for free reading of very fresh fiction! Readers are encouraged to comment as well.”
copyright roger cohen
The makings of a world class cellist…
they said. Oh what he could’ve become! He’s a simple man… lives thriftily… his only joy, making hauntingly beautiful music… man and instrument as one, creating mournful, soulful, exquisite sound… But more than that, he’s my man.
I’ll never forget that night. On my way home from cello practice, I was attacked. Hans made it just in time… the two men escaped but not before breaking his fingers. Now I look at him… an empty shell of a man. And though he says he loves me, I just know… He’s never truly forgiven me.
Sad. But v good. Again!
^^ yes broken dreams really are sad..thank you
I got a notice about your post Trifecta – Intention, which I thought was brilliant. But when I can’t find it on your blog. It’s lost or hidden
i deleted it. ^^ i got conscious about it. any family member could stumble upon my blog and banish me for saying something bad about priests and nuns ^^
i’ll think about reposting it.. i’m moving out of the house sometime this year anyway. lol ^^
Well that’s a pity. Glad I got to read it. If you don’t repost it that’s ok. You have a life to live, with your family, and there’ll be lots more good writing from you I’m sure that you’ll feel you can share without it wrecking your life.
Ironic that you can write so freely about sex but not about the topic of that deleted post no?
sex i think they can forgive as i’m already old but badmouthing their “connections to God”.. i think not ^^ my family’s a huge “supporter” of the church, financial and otherwise. ooh but i really did hate that priest.
Yes well I think the whole world knows now that priests are not all sweetness and light. Very creepy. Hope you didn’t go through anything too traumatic.
not too traumatic but enough never to go to confession again — ever. ^^
Yeah, no kidding. V creepy.
Great story, kz. I knew something sad was going to happen. Not the fingers! Nicely done.
yes i think the first lines did give it away ^^ thanks so much, glad you liked it ^^
I was still surprised by the outcome though, kz.
glad to know. to be honest, i found the prompt quite difficult.lol ^^
To be honest, I always find them difficult. Ha ha
haha ^^
He resents that she can play and he can not. I can see that. Sad take, KZ.
indeed. i’m glad you saw where his anger comes from.. thanks
Nicely done kz…
thank you
That’s touching … and you shouldn’t feel guilty about it !!!
yes but of course she couldn’t help but feel guilty.. after all, music was his life ^^ oh well… thank you ^^
never has forgiven – but he should. well done.
thank you
kz – just read comments – please put Trifecta back! (I;ll start a campaign!) the easy answer is the 2nd blog for those posts! Yes, your name shows up hen you comment, but those are your fans!
The tone of this story has real resonance the man devoted to his music, to playing, who has a dark flaw to his character seen through his jealousy. The rhythm of the story is just right. The attack, and now she is the real artist of the two. Very nice work…
hmnnnn i’ll consider making a second blog… thanks for the very kind comment
….and THEN you can post Trifecta and other stuff! If its challenges it will be read, if not, its starting from zero though…keep writing kz…keep writing..
i will ^^
and thank you. i think i’ve grown a lot since the challenges.. from someone who’s never really written fiction (except for high school English assignments) and also felt really happy
short (in fact, very short) story but very well written.. you’re very talented
awww thanks
there are more works from other writers if you click on the link ^^
yes i would
Original take on the prompt. Nicely done.
thank you
Wow. What a story you’ve woven with this prompt. Bittersweet though!
thanks
Dear KZ,
You captured the lingering resentment of a damaged soul well with your piece this week.
Aloha,
Doug
thank you, Doug
A good piece of storytelling this week, KZ. Great job with layering.
Shalom
Rochelle
thank you
Very descriptive which amplifies his loss in such a short story. Very sad and makes me want to know more of their relationship.
thank you for droppin’ by and reading this
Oh no, not the fingers! A very sad story, not only for him, but also for her, if she still hasn’t been forgiven.
they won’t last any longer i think.. thank you ^^
That’s a tragic twist on the man rescuing his woman in distress. Beautifully written though.
thank you
Hi KZ,
Maybe he should switch to a wind instrument. Good story of misfortune and regret. Ron
thank you, Ron:)
Oh I can feel Hans’s resentment. Well done.
Your story has particular resonance for me. My granddad could have been a concert pianist if he hadn’t also been a butcher and taken off the end of one of his fingers.
oh no… what a shame.. well at least he had two passions and he was able to fulfill the other, yes? thank you for reading my story..
What a tragedy. Sometimes you can’t go back to the way life was before terrible things happen. You set the scene so well as you describe the musician in the beginning paragraphs, then quickly introduce the crisis – and then the awful end of the story. Beautifully told.
thank you for your kind comment:)
As a pirate once said, our couples this week are quite different. Well felt and written!
janet
thank you, janet ^^
Well-written! As a musician, my greatest fear is having my fingers broken. Just so you know, though, the instruments in the picture are double basses…!
hahaha oh my effin god everyone’s been writing bout cellos! i swear i have no idea bout instruments! ^^ thank you! i’m glad you dropped by. ^^
Did really well, KZ. Keep up the good work! It has some “flow” to it … which music is, right?
i hope so.. thank you ^^
Oh no, how sad! A tragic tale very well written.
thank you
good one, sometimes the costs are higher than we expect.
a very good write-up. Reminded of a Sidney Sheldon novel where they break a pianist’s wrist..very touching
i’ve read that like a long time ago!! i didn’t remember ’til now though… yes, that’s so right!^^ thanks
Kz,
Perhaps he doesn’t forgive himself and resents her because she is a constant reminder of what he could have been. Sad not to forgive her for something she had no control over…Poor woman doesn’t need to be forgiven she needs to be loved. Nice work KZ.
Tom
ah yes… i think he does love her but every single day, as she reaches the height of her career, he’s reminded of his loss, gets eaten by jealousy, and hates her for being a daily reminder what he could have been — yes that’s right ^^ thank you ^^
Sad that his love is being buried under hate and eaten by jealousy…a touching piece.
Thank you.
That’s so sad. They took away his music. Part of him – his soul. You wrote the pain well. I think she feels guilty because she wishes she could somehow change it. Because of her love for him she wants to see him happy again and that eats at her soul. Perhaps?
oh definitely… i think that with every success in her career, it feels more like punishment than blessing
thank you
That is such a sad story.
A well-written, sad story.
thank you ^^
Very sad, haunting tale. Well done, kz.
thank you ^^
A sad end to that story and adding the personal aspect of their relationship makes it even more so. An usual take here, as most people went off in more humorous directions. Fine job; what’s next for them?
idk.. she’ll get famous.. he’ll get drunk. they’ll separate..but not before a year of infidelity.. that she knows of but tolerates coz she blames herself, blah blah.. then the love disappears… idk.. haha thanks, perry! ^^
A sad, complex story and very enjoyable. Great writing!
thank you:)
It must have been the mob. I hear they enjoy smashing body parts of musicians. A sad tale, told vey well.
thanks
Great story even though it’s sad.
thank you ^^
Very well told story, and shattered dreams are never possible to mend.
thank you
What Doug said! Very well done.
Sad.
yes. thanks for reading
Oh, my heart sunk. So sad.
thanks for reading..
This is heartwreching. great writing.
thank you
so much emotion packed into so few words. great story.
thanks. glad you liked it ^^
Honestly, I can see him being upset, but me? I would be happy to have the girl!
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/01/13/cliches-friday-fictioneers-late/
Scott
thank you, scott
A very creative take on the theme, KZ. And well written.
thank you
Beautiful and sad, Kz.